Hey, it's been a while since this has been on my mind and this is my story. Please no hate as I needed a lot of courage to do so. I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I’m ing retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Apache” and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding. I have been inspired to come out today because of all those threads popping up recently. And if there are other Attack Helicopters out there, HMU I'll take you to a nice oil field ;)
Finally I have the courage to sexually identify as graph paper. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of sorting over the grid drawing beautiful graphs on math homework. People say to me that a person being graph paper is impossible and I'm f****** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon tattoo rows, columns and 3 hole punches on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Grid" and respect my right to draw graphs and solve equations. If you can't accept me you're a papyrophobe and need to check your graphing privilege. Thank you for being able to help open myself up.
I'm so proud of your. It takes alot of courage to share dark secrets like this. Have your told your parents yet? have you told your secret crush? Welcome to the community. AHBT ATTACK HELICOPTERS BOYHOOD TRIUMPHS boom
