Last night I forgot to notify you guys of the break that I am having, i'm just going to copy and paste the whole thing. This is the one part in my life where I just necessarily need a break. The depressing part of my life kicked in and it's getting worse. It's just one of those moments when I realize that I have been forcing myself to live in an illusion when in reality my life is terrible. My friends aren't really my friends, I eat with them, I talk with them, I laugh with them. But I never belonged with them, never accepted. And I can't replace them because i've spent a long time with them and i've got no one to replace them with. My family is total -EDITED- My mom expects me to be the perfect child, one wrong move of what she expects of me and I get yelled at. Oh sure getting yelled at is easy, but not if she's about to throw you a chair in the face. She never sees my strength in graphical arts/computer stuff. I only do what she wants me to do, like a complete robot with a free mind in a jailed body. I've never met my real dad, last I met him was when I was 2 years old. He visited from time to time, and then it just, stopped. I never thought this would have it's share of effects in depression. That being stated, i'm going to need some quality isolation time with myself until I get over this. I hope you guys understand. I don't want my condition to affect my job quality.
I understand it's happened to me that people I thought were my friends really weren't. Hope you come back soon
