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  • "Of happiness and glad"

    Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by Winnfield, Aug 13, 2017.

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    1. Winnfield
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      Winnfield Boss Member

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      Your monthly dose of optimism on my behalf.
      Don't question me, written in 5 minutes.

      "
      People think they know,
      The pain and gloomy words they do throw.
      Nothing will be quite so,
      Silence and peace on a silent lake shan’t row; racket and uproar may go.

      From the moment I get up,
      To the following day’s gloomy sunup.
      Here it is I am handed, a cup,
      Filled with heaviness and sadness closeup.

      I’m not sure of anything as bad,
      That has led to this forbad,
      Of happiness and glad.

      "
      @Jexica here you go, freak out at my semicolons... They're improperly placed I think...
       
    2. WiiTarded
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      WiiTarded Experienced Member

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      i have crippling depression
       
    3. leafu
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      leafu Experienced Member

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      your semicolons are grammatically correct dw
       
    4. bare
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      bare Well-Known Member

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      i adore ur writing
       
    5. jezz
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      jezz Well-Known Member

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      Yes they are
      The poem's good but the rhythm's irregular; fix it please.
      Semicolons are used in place of the word "so" or "because".
       
    6. Winnfield
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      Winnfield Boss Member

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      We're taught differently.
      Semicolons are used to connect to sentences.

      Part of the poem's "tone" is irregular, it symbolises... The meaning. How far through are you learning poems? In Year 10-11 they'll teach you about the rhythm etc.
       
    7. jezz
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      jezz Well-Known Member

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      Uh. We've done sonnets, ballads and linericks. We've been taught about rhythm. I'll never forget my teacher jumping up and down saying "tee tum tee tum".
       
    8. Winnfield
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      Winnfield Boss Member

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      Ahaha. Have you done like... Iambic and trochaic rhythm...? It's a nightmare. :l
      don't we all?
      thanks
      thank you, i adore your cat :)
       
    9. jezz
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      jezz Well-Known Member

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      We've done iambic pentameter
       
    10. Saturns
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      Saturns best valorant player Premium

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      your writing is so amazing omg
       
    11. Zambiana
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      Zambiana Well-Known Member

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      Are we writting rap songs? I got this fam. Here's some bars.

      And I walk across the room
      F*ck your bitch with a broom
      That's called double pentration
      Oh, yeah, I see you're mad, menstruation
       
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    12. Winnfield
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      Winnfield Boss Member

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      I hate it. Analysing it is like ratching through needles.
      heh
      love it. make vevo please?
       
    13. jezz
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      jezz Well-Known Member

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      i agree
       
    14. sircorgi
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      sircorgi Boss Member

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      a semicolon isn't normally limited to just that, however that is a good rule of thumb

      The way i look at them is to link two main clauses together to create one whole clause, but could be sentences on their own if you put a period instead.
      Instead of using it everywhere, I tend to use them when the two clauses orient on the same topic or are about the same thing. However I make sure that they can be individual sentences (My teacher taught me this tyvm teacher) before using a semi-colon

      an example cud be like "Our comp was really bad; we lost the competitive game"
       

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